Watching the right wing spin machine when it starts belching smoke and making those noises that sound like effort is a truly dizzying experience. It often becomes a vortex of stupidity that threatens to suck the very minds from those who encounter it. That's by design, of course. The faithful are left more stupid, and the opposition is left speechless from the shear vertigo of trying to imagine the depths of swirling idiocy.
Arizona's new law, the "Papers NOW! Citizen, or are you Really?!" statute has certainly added the chunky parts to the Stupid Stew. Reading the responses from the wingnuts is kinda like being a contestant on some surreal edition of Who Wants to be a Millionaire?, only the prize for victory is a headache from having to experience the mental imbalance of the answers to questions that those in a rational world would never have to ask. So here's today's final question, with a migraine just one answer away:
Who's response to Arizona SB 1070 is truly the most retarded? Is the answer ..
A) Rep. Steve King (Rufingkiddingme -Iowa). He insinuated that Rep. Raul Grijalva was an American traitor, on behalf of Mexico, and that Grijalva's district has defacto been ceded to our southern neighbor.
"I'm wondering if we look at the map of Congressman Grijalva's congressional district if we haven't already ceded that component of Arizona to Mexico judging by the voice that comes out of him, he's advocating for Mexico rather than the United States and against the rule of law, which is one of the central pillars of American exceptionalism." [emphasis added]
B) Iowa State legislative hopeful, Pat Bertroche. He thinks we need to tag "them" like maybe with the 'mark of the beast', but at least we'll know where they are when we have to round them up or need our crops picked, yes massah sir.
"I think we should catch 'em, we should document 'em, make sure we know where they are and where they are going...I actually support microchipping them. I can micro-chip my dog so I can find it. Why can't I microchip an illegal? That's not a popular thing to say, but it's a lot cheaper than building a fence they can tunnel under."
C) President Senator John McCain,(ReallyforimmigrationreformbeforeIwasagainstit - Ariz). Them there illegals are causing car accidents - deliberately. For what nefarious purpose we may never know. John could tell us, but then I'm sure he'd have to kill us, and I'm not certain I want to be smothered to death with Polident.
When asked by host Bill O'Reilly if he was comfortable with the possibility of racial profiling, McCain said he wold be "very sorry" if it happened, but suggested it's justified because of "the people whose homes and property are being violated. It's the drive-by that -- the drivers of cars with illegals in it that are intentionally causing accidents on the freeway."
McCain added: "Look, our border is not secured. Our citizens are not safe." But the Arizona senator did not provide any additional details to back up his assertion about cars carrying illegal immigrants "intentionally causing accidents."
D) My personal choice, Rep. Duncan Hunter Junior, (Retarded - California). Junior only wants to violate the rights of American citizens as granted by the Constitution, but it's all about keeping families together. And really, who wouldn't want to take a big ole crap on our foundational legal document in order for families to enjoy forced incarceration, being trucked across a border to wherever the INS dump point is, and being left with nothing but whatever you were allowed to bring by the loving and concerned agents forcibly deporting you? Isn't that a hallmark moment that families can share for generations to come? Or, at least they could enjoy this fine family adventure if they only had America souls ...
"We just can't afford it anymore," Hunter said. "That's it. And we're not being mean. We're just saying it takes more than walking across the border to become an American citizen. It's within our souls."
Emphasis mine. So, there you have it contestants. Is the answer A, B, C, or D.
WHERE DO YOU DEPORT U.S. CITIZENS TO YOU BLEEPING MORON?
I’m sorry, I’m going to take the caps off now. Just for a minute there, it was in my soul. Seriously, do you know what you call a U.S. citizen summarily sent to Thailand or Suriname or Mexico or Turkey? AN ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT.
I think this contestant will be picking D. So, what's your final answer?